ADHD as a Creative Freelancer - struggles and anxiety, daily life with medication and knowing oneself.

Hi!

In late 2025 I got my diagnosis of ADHD which showed an emphasis on attention deficit disorder.

I have been highly suspicious of this condition for at least 5 years that kept growing the more life demanded of me, and the more diagnosed people I knew with whom I shared a handful of acute struggles but also some shapes of enthusiastic behavior - or maybe they are called obsessions.

Here I want to discuss some aspects of freelancing in creative industries, with an ADHD brain which constantly leads me in the direction of whatever else I don't have to do in the moment - unless it’s the very start of a project, where our enthusiasm is peaking, or the delivery deadline is very soon, being the urgency that drives us.

Overall I feel like having ADHD is being simultaneously under and overstimulated all the time and that my energy management is faulty: There is very little between loads of energy and exhaustion. This is one of the difficulties where medication has seem to made some improvement; more of this later in this article.

Looking for solutions within a broken exploitative capitalistic system won't help:

As many of us did, I spent dozens of hours watching and reading about productivity, trying different apps, scheduling methods, listing methods, and I'll say that 99% was a waste of time: One good is example is "taking regular breaks": the apparent simple act of taking 5-minute breaks once in a while is, for me, a terrible strategy from two different sides: if I am in the flow, it doesn't make sense at all to stop it (and I sort of can't - the drive / energy then is strong) and if I am not in the flow, I simply won't come back from those 5-mins. The inability to go in and out of tasks has been my crux and this is exactly where I felt emotional dysregulation the strongest: if I was slightly into something or invested in working on the pile of stuff accumulated and got interrupted - by a phone call, an unannounced door bell - I'd get upset and, with my tendency to ruminate thoughts, that was considerably unhealthy.

When I say "I got upset", I was not throwing chairs into the wall or anything near that; it's an internal process that can easily spiral into "how is it that so many people are completely oblivious that there are fundamental differences between human beings?" which could lead into searching the internet for this, which lead to many other things until I got bored. If you know, you know.

And the guilt - or self-doubt or frustration.

Some people in the sound design and field recording industry work A LOT and are so incredibly productive that at times in the past, I felt something must have been wrong with me. Many times these feelings would conflate with periods where money was running low. In my life this has the full potential of a cascade of "I should have done this and that at that time."

While, yes, I should have planned for the future, it is extremely important to be clear on what I dread to do and how much time am I willing to put into projects I don't like. I have started a number of sound effects libraries out of dedicated recordings I've done for that purpose, but the truth is that the remaining process of building one is not something I enjoy very much, so realistically I will probably never prioritise it.

Knowing myself - where I feel purpose, where creativity flows, what conditions I really need to even begin focusing, as well as things I dread, methods I don't like, uncomfortable environments - has been key to diminish confusion, frustration and even starting enjoying more parts of my life.

WHAT ACTUALLY HELPED ME HAVING A MORE PRACTICAL DAY:

1) if I am working for someone else, I'm more conscious of the type of detail I am putting time on: much of the detail I used to spiral myself into and has costed my time has often been completely unnecessary and we'd be both better off if the tasks required would just be completed. I have to constantly remind myself of this and really fight the urge to do anything else. I ask myself: “does this make sense right now?”.

2) communication and feedback with clients: whenever I bump into some feedback or instruction I don't find clear, I don't waste more than a couple of minutes trying to figure it out. It's better use of time to ask the client what they mean, or where / when they mean so. For example, since I work mostly with audio, using actual timestamps instead of a description is what works best.

It's no wonder that the difficulty to follow instructions is very common amongst us (and one of the questions of the assessment). My brain can figure out at least a couple of different ways in which to interpret each point. Recently a client sent their feedback over in a short email and while talking about the same subject, they made two different paragraphs. Just this small visual detail made me wonder if it was the same point in both that was being discussed.

3) if something that I had been trying for years, doesn't work, I stop insisting on it. I remember writing down what an ideal routine would be like for me (maybe 10 times) and that included preparing several meals once a week. But the day comes and I'm just out of patience. Sometimes I am able to do it, but rarely on a rigid scheme of making 5-7 meals for the week. Other times, it just happens spontaneously - like cooking a bigger batch of lentils or beans, adding some ingredients, shape them into patties / burgers and freeze them.

4) Now, I am not quite sure if this is an experience that goes for most of us, but I have been paying attention to what if feels like cycles of energy and limits through the weeks. In many aspects, things need to reach a limit point for me to take action: this is very noticeable regarding tidying up and cleaning the house; I can keep the counter clean and organized for several days until my energy drops and I just don't have patience or can’t bother - or panic with work - and I barely do dishes for 2 days. After this, there is a point where it is just too much and so, independently of my tiredness or whatever else I should be doing, I will take care of it - leaving that day’s priorities behind. Furthermore, when it comes to the cleaning, I never do the whole house at once, because I get really bored and out of patience and, again, my system of endless detail is just not practical in reality. Why do I do it? If you don’t experience this, I can only imagine how absurd it sounds, like I am a helpless hostage of my own mind, but it does feel like a strong gravitational pull, and skipping those details take away the satisfaction of doing it. It might compensate in the end, but the process feels very contradictory to me.

Though it’s difficult, a neurodivergent person still has responsibility for themselves and their family if that is the case. Having ADHD is not the same as character and it’s our obligation to understand the impact this has on ourselves and the people around us.

ROUTINE HABITS THAT MAKE THE DIFFERENCE

1) sleep: Without any doubt for me, how I sleep can almost entirely dictate how my day is going to go. This means I really need to take care of my sleep. We already know the fundamental advantages of regular sleeping times, no screens, low lights, etc. However, what has been making the biggest difference for me is having a way to conclude the day. On top of the list is exercise that demands effort from my body and concentration from my mind, but going for a nice walk or bike ride (I live in the countryside so nice walks are guaranteed) or, even better, during summer months, going for a swim just before sunset. Paired with what we know about circadian rhythms and light exposure, this has been pure gold. Do I often have issues getting out of the house? Yes and if I spend 2 to 3 days inside I start to feel a little depressed immediately. This is another factor where I do need to push extra for my own well-being.

2) no computer after sunset: besides helping me regulating my schedules, I avoid an awful computer / screen exhaustion that accumulates after some days in a row. Winding down nicely even if just for a couple of hours before going to bed makes a huge difference in my mood.

3) embracing spontaneity: I know that this might sound contradictory but sometimes it’s necessary. If I am not endangering any delivery and I feel I’m taking no pleasure out of work, I can go outside or practice an instrument, whatever feels right in the moment.

MEDICATION

*This is not medical advice and it’s just my personal experience*

I started prescribed medication quite shortly after the diagnosis and then stopped during my trip to Brazil and Peru, which lasted close to 16 weeks. Upon returning home in mid-April I re-started. The most obvious thing I’ve noticed is that my mind goes quieter: it’s like it has quieted down 20 voices out of 25. When I think about it, I can actually just be on one task and make it happen. If I get interrupted I can easily get back to it. This is a massive new experience in my life!! It feels like I am not aware of it until I actively think about it. Also, because I am less fidgety and agitated I snack less - which means I interrupt myself less, I go up less times from the desk and the work flow… flows.

In turn, the ability to work better and effectively having more tools to produce more has directly eased my anxiety: it took much of the mental load that followed me from the second I am waking up to the minute I fall asleep.

Sometimes I take it to clean the house (again, I dread this task) or if I have a bunch of everyday tasks that I find particularly dreadful.

There is something that I find important to share from my experience regarding this: Taking the medication for this effect should not be a replacement for controlling and taking care of my environment. There was this one occasion where I went out to the local café with a friend on a Friday afternoon. As usual, it got full of people, from children to older folks. At some point, 2 kids were playing with plastic bottles next to me, the tables besides me had a group of people that started to become louder and next to it a big sound speaker. I felt the medication effect wear off as if a part of my soul was also leaving my body: the cacophony started to irritate me greatly, I needed to put immense effort to focus on what my friend was saying and I started to feel my heart racing out of anxiety while my mood just downgraded. It took me more than a couple of hours after going home to feel OK again.

While this can pertain to my own sensitivity, it showed me clearly that I should never use the medication to obliterate the environment since it feels like it’s going to burst sooner or later.

Another point is that, while it has actually helped me to focus for a given period, it does not help me make better decisions. I feel that this is fundamental to underline because if something stressful occurs, I’ll be in it, or if I get distracted with something (on purpose or not), it’s going to be difficult to swap to the tasks / work I’m supposed to do.

In a similar note to what I wrote above, I can’t see it as a solution to become what I am not. During my trip I still worked remotely but a little less, but as soon as work in the research station piled up I started to feel stressed again but it got eased as I talked to myself in realistic terms, i. e., “does this have to be delivered and finalized this year and shouldn't’’t you be enjoying being in the actual Andean Amazon?”

A reality check for the good is as important as taking responsibility when we’re at fault.

I am the one living in this body that knows my sensorial sensitivities, what I can’t tolerate, what triggers me, etc. My priorities can diverge greatly from another person. For example: I can’t sleep in bedsheets that are not very very soft (unless I am really exhausted) which requires me to spend more money in bed sets, or I can’t make it in a terribly noisy environment or with insulting white lights, so I had to become direct about refusing certain invitations or I choose to show up just for a little bit to say hi. What other people will think, if they are not willing to listen, is something I can’t bother much with. I had very uncomfortable and hurtful conversations with family members about what ADHD means in my life, but I won’t go on an attempt to convince them this is real and opt not to talk about it.

And you? I know so many sound creatives that have ADHD. Please let me know your struggles, your personal findings, where you find joy and things you avoid.

Let me take the opportunity to share the conversation with field recordist and sound designer Andy Martin from The Wind is the Original Radio podcast. We talk a lot about his experience with having ADHD and you might find it invaluable and very fun!

Hello, World!

Interview: Andy Martin pt. 1